Dang Mr. President
-by Mark Pennington
It is indeed tougher than I thought possible. There were two of us tonight and we utterly failed. We tried for 30 minutes and never got the pill down her. I finally tried what one suggested by putting it in syrup and putting it on her leg. *sigh* I now have a very sticky cat that refuses to clean her leg off and even the other cats wont do it. Now I am gonna have to bathe her. I bet THAT goes over like bad gas in church.
You know, I figured out tonight, that I would for certain have a sure fire way to choose who to vote for for president. If that person can pill my cat, he gets the vote. It shows determination and strength of character. His honest personality will show once the claws take purchase in presidential flesh. It will show diplomacy in spades if he can get the cat to come to the same room with him and a piller in it. I could be certain of his ability to take a stand on an issue and see it through no matter the cost. It will show just how committed he would be to health care (as he would certainly need it). War? I could see how he responded under intense fire and he would have to be in the same room and I would know if he was a hero or not as most would run like the wind. If I told him to have a physical exam before he tried to pill that demon and he didn't, he would be a fool,(and a fool for not getting a supply of his blood type set aside for himself). There would be no need for all the negative commercials, just one showing him wrestling a Bengal with piller in hand. Any cat owner would spread the word about the bravery and determination behind the man, a real man at that (even if he was a she, she would be a REAL man with great big brass ....) Al-Quida? HA! Bin Ladin would be easy to find if the presidential hopeful could find that cat! Would he worry about admitting he had made a mistake in trying to pill a cat? Hell no! It would be easy to admit that kind of failure because it would be glaring. Flip flopping? One word....Bengal. He would really get a dose of flip-flopping then. Flying a fighter plane, combat in Vietnam, Iraq, N Korean nuc-U-leer threats? All of that would be easy if just one of those guys could come into my living room and place a teeny white 1/4 tablet into the mouth of a 4.69 Lb kitten. All I can say is Debate Shebate.... I got a foolproof way to choose.